Selected Excerpts from the Fake Journal of a Fictional Animal Collective Fan

on Oct 15, 2012

May 13, 2012
Dear Journal,
Today it’s official! There will be a new Animal Collective record soon! It’s called Centipede Hz, and it comes out in September, and I’m so excited! Every record they make is better than the last, and I’m sure this one will be too!

May 14, 2012
Dear Journal,
Geologist was on the BBC today! They talked about the new record, and there was some big news. DEAKIN IS BACK! Oh gosh, that’s so exciting. Also, Geologist said that the band went ‘back to their roots’ on Centipede Hz. Hopefully ‘back to their roots’ means Sung Tongs and not Here Comes the Indian, but either way I’m sure it will be great!

June 20, 2012
Dear Journal,
I know that it doesn't really matter, but I’m a little worried about Animal Collective! They showed the cover art for Centipede Hz on the internet today, and it’s a little... gross? It has giant lips and the lips have eyelashes or something, and... it’s kinda hard to describe. I have to get over it though, because I’m sure the songs will still be really good. Maybe the cover will grow on me too!

August 12, 2012
Dear Journal,
Big news today! Animal Collective is going to play Centipede Hz on an internet radio show! I am very tempted to listen to it, because I can’t wait to hear the new songs! But no, that would ruin my super fun release day plans. I have to be good and not listen to ANY of the songs beforehand. I’m going to go to the record store right after work, and I’m going to buy the real life CD, and I’m going to take it home and listen to it over and over and over. Maybe I’ll eat pizza! I want it to be special.

September 3, 2012
Dear Journal,
I’m staying up past my bedtime, because I’m just SURE that Pitchfork will post their review of Centipede Hz tonight! It comes out tomorrow, and they wouldn't wait till after. I’m so excited to see what rating they give it! I hope it gets the highest score of the year!

September 4, 2012
Dear Journal,
Well, this day had to come but I just didn't think it would be so soon. Pitchfork gave Centipede Hz a 7.4. That’s too low to even get the ‘Best New Music’ label! I was so upset today that I didn't even buy the CD. I think I’m going to ignore it, and pretend that Animal Collective stopped making records after Merriweather Post Pavilion, just like I did after Bill Berry quit R.E.M.

September 10, 2012
Dear Journal,
Last week I was too upset to even think about Animal Collective, but I think I’m getting over it now. I’m still sad that Centipede Hz is not the best ever, but maybe I should listen to it anyway? I don’t know though, I just don’t want to be disappointed.

September 14, 2012
Dear Journal,
Well, I decided to download Centipede Hz today. It was on sale, and I was just too curious. I have only listened to it once on my lunch break, but... I think I like it? I’m confused though, because the Pitchfork guy said it had too much going on, like too many crazy noises and things? I mean, there are definitely lots of crazy noises, but it’s Animal Collective! It’s like that guy never heard ‘We Tigers’ or something!

October 15, 2012
Dear Journal,
I’m so happy I gave Centipede Hz a chance! It’s maybe not as good as Merriweather, but that’s ok! I’m a little sad that I didn't buy the CD now, but I still think the cover art is creepy so maybe it’s better this way cause I can change the picture on my computer! Anyway, New Town Burnout is my favorite song I think, but I like all the other ones a lot too! When they said it was going to sound like their old stuff I expected a lot of yelling and drums, but there isn't much of that really. It’s just a little less... computer-y is all. It is definitely intense though! I don’t know what is going on over there in Baltimore, but seriously. Yesterday I tried to listen to that new Dan Deacon album America right after Centipede Hz, and my brain almost melted. So yeah, not gonna do that again!